It's Hogmanay

So where have I been - you may ask, or may not depending, I have been a terrible blogger, and my vice?? The dreaded sucking all your time "Facebook" with so many old and new friends on there it seemed a good place to communicate and going there everyday just sucks the life out of me any place else on the computer.

My Iphone is a fantastic tool but it is also unsocial and a time sucker, no one needs my email reply's instantly, I dont NEED to check it every 3 minutes for new messages but I do. Things are going to be changing and not in a new years resolution , just because it is time to go back to my familiar things.

So what has happened in the past 6 months since I stopped blogging,

Well.....Nathaniel has now turned 6 lost 3 teeth and is growing up very tall.

We bought a house a lovely 4 bedroom 2 bathroom which is wonderful and we have loved settling in although the initial road was bumpy and we were all sick.

Simon performed in another musical - this one called "Urinetown" and it was very well received.

Me - well I play on the computer, work very little as work has been quiet and gain weight due to being lazy! I also volunteer a lot at school.

So I look forward to seeing you join me on the journey of the next year with less facebooking and more outdoor and exciting things to explore and learn!!

Yesterday we all went on a family day out to "Point Reyes" we went on the "Earthquake" trail it was a lot of fun and we finished up buying some meat from Marin Sun farms and lunch at Cafe Reyes.

Family wise both Sylvia and Peter have been hospitalised over the past 3 months at various times, both recovering well although dad did require further surgery on his remaining leg.

The snowfall has been a problem this year in the UK, for us we have to drive to tahoe to experience that - which reminds me I must buys so

me goggles for nathaniel, I cant find his pair from last year!

Well it is 8am and I know some of you have already started to celebrate the new year, so Happy New year to you all and I hope 2010 is kind to you - didnt it come round fast!!

big news

nathaniel may soon be with out a tooth, he is very excited I was kind of hoping picture day would come before the teeth fall out but who know.

We owe this wiggly tooth to a friend who hit his face with a hard ball thus loosening the tooth, after much blood and pain, it is settling down and now the excitement of the tooth fairy is upon us, after a frantic text to Simon about bringing some money home, the tooth however, didnt fall out, YET

So we wait anxiously for that first tooth to fallout and nathaniel will then take his first step towards adult hood and his second and last set of teeth!

How exciting for him!!

Making changes

I talk about this a lot and for some reason the changes dont happen but I do not want to go on like this. After another trip to the uk and several more pounds gained, I see myself on that treadmill heading in the wrong direction on the scales,

For now the biggest changes I am going to make is increase my fruit and vegetable intake, and from that I will move forward with my exercise once I have my intake controlled - I must also make this clear I am by no way stuffing myself full of crap, my body is obviously one that is just sensitive to some of my choices for my meals.

I dont know if I will do the half marathon, I do think i can do it but want to not have too many stresses so for now I will get out, train a bit and eat plenty fruit and vegetables and cut my portion sizes down!!

Here goes!

Brave or just plain stupid

Well to be honest probably a bit of both, so I signed up for another 1/2 marathon and I will be documenting my trials and tribulations on a separate blog, open to read but will still keep this one for non running stuff

I have linked it in the side margin, but incase you cant see it

check out http://runsfmagain.blogspot.com

I will try to document on that how my training is going, the support I am getting and how i am doing!

So far just completed day 2 and I am doing great, too soon to be a disaster!!

thanks for following (if you click follow it will email you when i update it)

still nothing

So our refurbishment continues and I have not felt well since they started, constant headaches and sore throats, it must be all from the works. It is very draining day in and day out listening to the hammering, banging, soldering and all the other types of noises,  I tried to keep Nathaniel out side but that ended up just making him exhausted and really was no good, so instead we stay home at least some of the time and are tortured while we try to do laundry, cooking  or just some down time etc etc

This I must admit has been the longest and hardest month of my life.

Even nathaniel sigh's as they turn up on the weekends.  Unable to open our windows the house smells and is stuffy and I just wish I could escape to a hotel for a week to "feel better"

Every day I wait for our notice to leave coming through the door, but as of today, I have heard nothing yet, I search through craigslists for rentals and usually they end up being a dead end.

I can do nothing but accept this miserable situation and get my mind and body dragged down and down.  The summer is approaching and I feel like a prisoner in my own home watched and looked at constantly by workmen, knowing my coming and goings, nathaniel misses going out to play and I miss the fresh air  - such a basic thing.

Lets pray for 6.30 when they finally pack up and leave, for about 1 hour I can open the blinds see sunshine and open the windows, just till dark and listen to  - mostly peace

Ouch

well, we are now 19 days into the refurbishment of my apartment and all I can say is that it is affecting nathaniel and I considerably,

Initially, I tried to keep out the house while the work is on but that is impossible it is continuous from 7.45 till 6.30pm, and nathaniel and I are exhausted from trying to fit in all the play dates, not only that but the house is covered in dust often getting in my eyes, the house smells and I am beginning to feel very unwell, I just want to book into a hotel till it is done, headaches, nausea, sore throat and painful eyes are some of the symptoms I am exhibiting and I can say through most of this I have been off the alcohol - all but the day i came back to the windows out and dust literally everywhere, I did pour myself 2 glasses.

Meanwhile I am sick of looking for rentals and I am sick of being patient and not angry, i am very angry so angry i could cry but then that would stop me cleaning up this pit that is no longer a place i want to call home, I opened the windows today to try and get some air circulating but it caused more dust into the place and was a total waste of time, I really just want to cut my headoff, then the misery would stop - this is not healthy

so far so good

I am pleased to say I have reeled in my drinking and have now stopped drinking at home completely although I was driven to some last night after I came home to find no windows in our house and dust everywhere.

That is a rare occasion for me now, I am leaving my social drinking to when I am out!

I have noticed a huge difference in my attitude!

After a huge hot spell I am glad to say it has cooled off a little bit and I am just trying to make it though each day without having too much of a crazy schedule for Nathaniel and i

how much is too much

I have been thinking about this question for a while and always refer it to wine, how much is too much.

I have been aware that my daily drinking of wine is a focus of my evening and it has had me very concerned. It wasnt the drinking so much but indeed the "when did it start being every night?" question was in my head.

Friends around me reassured me with "oh one is Ok" but digging deeper they were kind of like me - saying they were having one but often many nights they maybe had 2 or even 3, with the result of 3 glasses of wine leaving them moody, agressive and pretty much hung over the next day - i have these issues if i have 3 glasses of wine.

Since I couldn't remember when I started my "daily" drinking, I have decided to stop and so far 6 days and still counting I have not had a drop - not even sniffed at the open wine bottle that is in the fridge - i am pretty proud of myself and I have been in different situations, a group night out, alone at home and a night in with Simon so I have been tested and no-one has asked me to do this, I want to!

I feel calmer and more fun, I definately have more energy and am sleeping better, today I was going to have a glass of wine as a reward for "being good" then i realised how silly that actually sounded - why reward myself for something I didnt actually need.

So proudly I have cut back and dont really miss it and ..........well..... it will do no harm!

Update

So it has been ages that I wrote in my blog and ages since I felt inspired to write in my blog, so what has been happening??

Well I turned another year older and celebrated in fine style with my family and friends, as usual, i was spoilt rotten with nice gifts and the money I received I spent at lululemon my new favourite sports shop - they do just fabulous fitness wear and since that is something I do wear practically every day it is nice to have comfortable stuff.

We continued to meet with our friends and get used to Nathaniel's baseball practices and the sun has definitely been shining.

We were fortunate enough recently to go to a Rodeo and I have taken advantage of the good weather and done several hikes!!

It is really hard to believe we are now in the middle of April speeding along to May!!

Life is definitely doing OK for us and we do count our blessings everyday!!

so......

I think my ZEST for life lasted about 2 minutes then due to over work, I ended up sick and useless but after I have slept for 3 days nearly - except for school pick ups and runs to Karate, sports clinic and baseball, i was able to rest, I now feel better and hopefully I can post more positive news in the next week or so.

You will hear of me turning 38  - can you believe it - I cant and my dad turning 70.

Woo hoo, I LOVE birthdays!!

zest for life!

So this morning I got up extra early so I could fit in an exersise class before Simon left for work, up at 5.30 ready to work my core about till 7, I was very proud of myself that I did this as I have been trying to do it for weeks and ended up always just turning the alarm off and having an extra hour in bed!

I have stocked up on everything healthy from the supermarket (racing around the store while Nathaniel had his karate lesson!)

I am off to try Chi running tomorrow - no idea what that is about but it is a free session with the athletics store so i thought I would give it a whirl! 2 hrs running - that will be a challange!!

Some small baby steps I am going to take, instead of feeling I am not getting "gym" or running exercise get it other ways such as - take out Nathaniel's bike and instead of watching him run with him he gets up a fair pace!!

Also i have been meaning to get running during the 50 minutes I sit at Karate - so skip the cup of tea and get moving

Today we have a prettyquitte day which is good and then onto a busy weekend with T-ball lessons starting (baseball) so we need to uy trousers, shoes and a baseball glove!!, busy shopping for us!!

and maybe I will sign up for the 10k in april!!

Definitely feeling better

Legoland

So Nathaniel and I boarded a plane and hit San Diego, what an amazing trip it was, we landed hired a car and drove to Seaworld, with the sun baking hot we enjoyed the animals and the water rides before heading back to the car where i discovered that the car had not been locked, no central locking on this car!!

Nothing taken though thankfully and we drove to Motel 6 for the night, we had a Valentines dinner at TGI fridays and Nathaniel fell asleep at the table, so I took my valentine back to the motel, early the next day we drove up to Carlsbad and went straight to legoland, it was my first time since I went to windsor when I turned 30 and there were no kids around, it was a fun place, very cute to see all the figures and again lots of rides and fun things to do, we were luckily enough to get in free for all 3 days thanks to a friend giving us free tickets!

Nathaniel has been very "into" Lego Starwars and Indian Jones so we definitely had some fun moments!

The good weather did disappear for 2 hrs but I expected that so had kept all the indoor shows and stuff for the "rainy day"

Nathaniel felt the hotel was "very fancy" and especially liked room service - not really as lavish as it seems as it allowed us to avoid the queues and eat early to keep his bedtime at 7pm

We eventually packed our bags and headed home and nathaniel was very disappointed he couldn't show "daddy" any of the stuff so i know we will visit again soon - the sea world tickets last all year anyhoo!!

A great rest was had by us both but we were happy to return back home!

Finding Balance

so, I really feel like I have lost the balance in my life, with me working so much to try and learn, i feel like it has flipped and all I do is work.

I feel like I cant concentrating, i am eating rubbish as I am so tired, I really feel like my life is just moving on day by day and i am not able to witness any of it.

never even getting to the gym as I have to either work or be ferrying my son to play dates and lesson's.  Previously I have discovered that 2 days worked well in our family but me working 3 pushes us over the edge, however i thought with the flexibility of this job it would help enable me to do more,

but I guess maybe not, lets see how the next month goes

anyone have any answers??

ON a lazy saturday afternoon!

Here I sit pondering life,

Having played my usual tetris on face book and made as many comments as I seem I went to check out craigslist - looking for a house to rent,

Not much around, I saw a nice one today but it is just a little "too open" a few doors would be nice - but it was a great garden and hot tub, the thought of living in the apartment for any more of a time makes me just want to grab anything cause no matter hat you have you make it work, but we cant really do that so on wards we go looking at some more - when they become available.

Simon is currently napping before we head out to Outback steakhouse for dinner, we should be going to chili's but since it is it's last weekend I fear most of the stuff would be out of stock, 

Chili's we will miss you!!

I guess the cheesecake factory is a good replacement!

being a weight watcher

So since January 2004, I have been a weight watcher and it has been a good thing, I lost a ton of weight and gave me some renewed confidence.

However being 10 - 15lb heavier the past year has made me scared, frantic about gaining all my weight back again, only someone who has lost weight kind of understands this dilemma,

here I am a normal BMI and within my weight range, wanting to get back to my "perfect" weight - and I will but I think my weight watching needs to be a little more secret, Nathaniel is talking a lot about diets and about "being fat" and he is so skinny I don't want him to keep going like that, so I will be good, I will chart, but i think I will stop going to the meetings and making a fuss about my size, we are who we are and I only wish I could see that it is OK to be the size I am, maybe someday, I don't want to diet forever!!

Punishments

So,

Nathaniel threw a fit in front of daddy at the weekend, (I am familiar with these they happen mainly every evening, and I throw him to bed!

However this one was because he didnt want to stop playing the wii, so infact he landed with a 1 week ban for the wii - we can still play it though!

Day one and 2 were fine but I did begin to wonder why we had imposed a ban like this on a bank holiday weekend. What would we fill the time with.

We ended up doing some really fun stuff, the discovery museum, the parks, riding bikes, more parks, talking and reading, making books etc etc. he is actually quite proud of his ban now!

Which leads me to wonder...how good is the wii and why do we let him play it at all, well it is a family game we can play together, it also allows me time free from him to prepare dinner, tidy up, take a shower, it helps him read, fight battles and learn about sports and taking turns.

So I guess the tantrum was just a moment of lost control, 5 year olds will have them - so do grown ups, but what we can learn is the lesson he learned yesterday in Karate - KEEP THE CONTROL WITH YOU!

Sensai was saying that as soon as you loose control it gets passed to another person to control you and that is now fun, we talked after and he decided he would take sensai's advice if he could and try to do the 3 breaths  to calm him down so he can control his temper.

Now with a weekend of me working and predicted rain - lets see how his temper is controlled

The Inauguration of Barrack Obama

So, I was going to write about something else but I will leave my thoughts on punishment for another day!

So....today the USA welcomed a new president to the white house! Much pomp and circumstance to lure citizens that this is the dawning of a new era, the beginning of  many wonders and lets not forget the fancy parade!

I am generally a pessimist with regards to politics - there is something funny about him I am not trusting - but then anyone who knows me knows that is pretty much how I feel about politics in general and no other "president" would ever really have me on their side - unless Nathaniel runs a few years down the line.  I do not know why I cannot celebrate but there you go, I want to wait and see how he does, I think my problem is that the american people voted in President bush - maybe by cheating the first time but he did rightfully get elected a second term, many people I talk to say oh he isn't our president but if a country should do anything it is come together and welcome the president who was voted in be a democracy! Don't ask people to vote if you don't want to hear the answer.  

Now I could go into dictators and how they could make a country work, but I wont....but just know this,  every leader has their own personal way to lead and we must trust them to lead.

Now onto Obama, the colour of his skin seems to be a big issue in this election but surely if we are treating everyone as one, that shouldn't be an issue that we have a mixed race president in the united states, cause he isn't black but mixed race and as my father pointed out, Americans are usual the first ones to be politically correct.

He seems to have a nice family and they seem happy (unless you read the "enquirer" while waiting to pay for groceries in safeway yesterday!!), so I wish him much success in his new job, he has a lot to achieve and unfortunately I believe the American people want miracles but that will take time.....we are in a deep recession and it will get much worse before it becomes better so Mr Barrack Obama (like every other politician/president) will find himself with some tough choices to make and they will not make everyone happy - not even you!!

What we all want in our lives is the same as our parents and grandparents is for a strong family foundation and a country to be proud of.

Lets support the new president in all he does and aims to achieve....

Welcome President Obama to the White house!

New Gym, new excitement

so what is making me smile these days!

Well, 2 things I think!

Sunshine - gosh the weather has been amazing we have been hitting the park so nathaniel is happier as I sit there with a book and read while he climbs and gets fresh air, it seems like a long time since he got out and about but it hasn't really!!

I joined a new gym - the JCC (jewish community center), I have not changed religions but am really looking forward to being a part of something again, I spend most of my days feeling very lost! Unable to keep contact with my friends since I took my new job has really isolated me and made me really sad, as well as being sick most of december, but I don't want to be sad, I want to see my friends and catch up on their news and have play-dates so from February, I have done some adjusting to allow me to work a 24 hr week but also have continuity so nathaniel can have play-dates, get to Karate and I can still have the dinner ready for when Simon gets home and get all the chores done!!  Rachelle, has told me so often to get a cleaner she has given up on me, but she also knows that I find it hard to explain the need for a cleaner - I feel everyone in the house can do it, unfortunately they don't!

Anyway, onto the gym and gosh that first spin class really hurt my bottom but I am positive and moving forward, Zumba was easier and fun despite my distinct lack of latin rhythm, and the equipment is great so over the next week I plan to try out all the classes I can in between working!!

So hopefully I will get better at my work, allow me to catch up with everyone a little easier and generally feel less overwhelmed!!

Watch this space!!

New Year - new challenges!

So,  the new year has come and gone, and are we still sticking with our resolutions!

Well so far I am, less food and drink more in the fitness department!

I am still trying to figure everything out in the job situation, it is pretty hard but as soon as my orientation is over with I will hopefully begin to feel more settled but for now it seems just a confusing maze!

Nathaniel is finding the return to school hard with the "getting out of bed part" being the hardest!! He is in the top group for reading which means in addition to the home work he also gets extra reading - thats doesn't quite make sense to me!

So not sure how our year will pan out we have a couple of ideas but have no time to sit down and work everything out!

We went skiing a few weeks ago and Nathaniel loved it and hopefully we will go again this weekend.

Simon is busy with all his theater stuff - not so busy with work!

California has been cool this month but apparently it is meant to be back up in the 70's this weekend - we certainly cant complain!

So,  onward and upward!

Happy new Year!